Wednesday 29 March 2017
Richard Story about three wise cousins
Once upon a again there was a man named toni want to be an islander He risk his life to a real islander to impress a girl, he woke early to get coconut he train he went to samoa to be a real islander 2 of their cousins helped them him out there cousin said “if u want to be a real islander you have to climbed the tree to get some coconut” there tried to speak english some of them hardcore fob then toni was laughing and the cousin said “ why you laugh for” then the next 2 years they went her dream girlfriend and they saw the girl boyfriend they were like OH MY GOSH also they girl boyfriend in theh car park and smashed him they rapped him around with tape and they in the back of the car of the boots and the girl was worried so toni walk to her to give her some company and help so the girl felt in love with toni cause the girl thinks his ex boyfriend is cheating on her so they lived happily after but they forgot the man in the car so we dropped him in the recycle bin then he got out then he went to the shop to buy to new clothes to get a new girlfriend then that's the end
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HI Richard,
ReplyDeleteThis story made me laugh especially the part about them forgetting the person was in the boot of the car and dropping him to the recycling bin. Remember to put fullstops and capital letters in the right place when editing your writing. Keep up the great work.
From Miss Lavakula
HI Mrs Lavakula nice to meet you again thank you for your advice and help also how is your new school:)
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